Some people have trouble making decisions. When facing whether it’s time to move into assisted living some elderly people decide to do nothing. Making the change of moving into assisted living seems too difficult or overwhelming. When the children of an elderly person attempt to help their parent(s) “decide” to move into assisted living, it is sometimes like trying to move Mt. Everest. The elderly person may resist any thought of moving from their home. They think the best decision is to stay where they have lived for the past 50 years.
I’ve met with family members saying that they want their mom or dad to “make the decision” to move into assisted living. “We want it to be mom or dad’s decision”, they say. It’s my experience that almost 100% of the time, if they want mom or dad to make that decision, mom or dad will decide to just stay where they are. The problem is that the decision to stay at home is not the best decision. Mom or dad may think that they can handle themselves safely at home but the truth is they can’t. If not for family members stopping in on a regular basis to check on them and do things for them, mom or dad would not be able to handle living at home any longer. Most family members don’t want to be the “bad” guy and make the decision for the parent to move into assisted living. Mom or dad may still be living at home but their quality of life is not good. They are isolated, eating poorly, the house is deteriorating and they are getting depressed. Does this sound like a good decision?
We all would like to think we make decisions based on sound logic, facts, experience and wisdom. When it comes to convincing mom or dad to move into assisted living, it becomes a very emotional decision for everyone concerned. These emotional feelings can cloud good judgement and decision making. Since moving from a beloved home is such a traumatic experience, family members need to recognize and appreciate that. However, it’s not just that mom or dad is leaving home, but it’s also about fear of the unknown. Mom or dad might feel like they are being abandoned, even though they are not. They may feel insecure because they will have to meet and make a new set of friends. They may be fearful of the horror stories they hear about how elders are abused. They may not want to spend the money they have saved up for just this reason.
Deciding to move out of a home and into assisted living is certainly a major decision. If someone is going to move into assisted living, I believe that Kingston is the best choice. Kingston offers the best care, best food, best activities and best price. Our reputation in the community is second to none. Over the past 25+ years, Kingston has a proven track record of providing genuine care with dedicated staff. Moving into Kingston can be one of the best decisions you could ever make. Give us a call today!
Bob Goyer
Community Relations Director
